Hello "me" .
I don't know what has been happening lately, but seems everyone is getting engaged or married . And the few married ones are getting pregnant . I don't know why, but I've never been close to any . That makes me wonder if maybe my will is to be a scientist, the one who doesn't marry for having a general love for humans, and not for someone in specific .
I remember I've been fascinated for science since very young , and since then I'd shock people saying I wouldn't get married or have kids . First time I said that I was 6 years old, according to mom .
Girls used to play "mom and dad", and I'd rather be the "crazy scientist", making my parents buy me all those chemistry features, that most of the kids didn't have any interest in . I still love science, but nowadays I start wondering if it's a good choice having nothing, but a brilliant lonely brain as company in the sunday evening or saturday night .
A life with a whole bunch of dirty nose loud kids, and a big belly husband sat down in the sofa, with the beer in his hand, complaining that your food doesn't taste as good as it used to, and that besides that you've been needing a diet, has always sounded like a miserable life to me . Cause a family will never be a a real normal family if the house ain't dirty( full of socks and glasses everywhere ), if kids don't cry during lunch time( they always have been hating lunch ), and if you and your husband don't argue for the most little idiot things twice a week( at least ) . I used to think someone who chooses such type of life might have some mental disturb, but nowadays I wonder if having a brilliant lonely brain as company in the last day of your life will make you feel fine .
I don't have a clue of what it's the worst of the ideas : if the idea that you spend a lifetime building a scientifical theory, that probably won't have any value tomorrow( cause scientifical knowledge has always been discardable somehow ) , or if the idea that you spend long years fucking the same man, that out of the blue looks at your "ugly just woke up face"and say " I don't love you anymore " .
Both cases don't seem too much pleasant, but I guess the " I don't love you anymore " may sound the most terrible thing to a normal woman . Well, we gotta remember that all genius that has lived in this Earth had nothing but a scholarship inside their pockets; the 3rd degree cousin they didn't even know about may get rich with the "now famous", and yet dead, books . I wonder how cool might be to a the dead scientist to see, from the dephts of hell, the 3rd degree cousin or uncle getting the Nobel( "representing him", course ) .
Thinking that way, there's no much glamour in science . Will you ever be on Vogue magazine for cleaning kid's butt or for not letting them eat dog's shit ? Well, maybe the paparazzi and the whole world would even find some "ecologicaly correct" reason for your action( cleaning kid's butt and not letting them eat dog's shit )...in case you were Madonna or Gisele .
And after all I still don't know what is the best option...does anyone ?
That's probably why Einstein and his friends has gone crazy . Maybe going crazy is the 3rd option .
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